Just sitting here... an outsider-looking in

This week I sit in a privileged position.

It is not very often that I feel like an outsider.

God has been good to my family and me; we are always treated with great hospitality and care. It may be a Kent Smith hand-made goody basket in our room at the Baymont or a bag of hickory-smoked ribs from Van’s Pig Stand as Sis. Bowman hands them in the door of the motor home. It could just as easily be the homemade noodles of Sis. McNeely, the one-of-a-kind sweet tea you get at the Shindolls' home, or a steak with a shrimp cocktail at St. Elmo’s, compliments of the Longs; but one thing is certain: we usually feel right at home and on the inside.

Today is different.

Today I am in a privileged position.

We are parked at a certain church somewhere between the two great oceans, while preaching in other churches in the area. It’s a large church with ministries for all ages. They have masterful preaching and a ministry team that is second to none, facilities that rival the largest denominational churches of the city, and a budget that is used weekly to help missionaries, both foreign and stateside. I have not preached for this certain church--yet, I am the one who is privileged.

Tonight is their church's community-wide fall fest. We have watched them work hard as they have set up booths, moved in trailers, set up sound systems, bounce houses, and bags of toys, and hooked together their large train ride. The work has been constant and done with cheer. But I sit today as an outsider.

I cannot tell you how many carnivals or festivals I have been a part of, worked, or led. It would be easier to list the number of years I have not worked on this type of effort than to try to count the times I have been involved.

There are things I would have been happy to do. I would have loved to help them work out the last-minute details, pull the boxes out of storage, come up with that last booth or prize, drive a tractor, or sell tickets. But today any of my experience or ability will go unnoticed as I sit idly by and watch. Today I am an outsider looking in--to their programs, efforts, and festivities.

I am sure the pastor and each one of those who work in the local church here would be mortified by my thoughts today. If they knew how I felt, they would begin to make excuses for their actions; and without a doubt, they would be apologetic in the most convincing way. But they will never know, because today, I am an outsider.

Don’t be sad for me. I don’t mind others' being involved and happy working in the kingdom… I just realized what it feels like to be an outsider – looking in.

I got the privilege today to feel like so many may feel. I wonder how people feel driving down our streets when they look at our churches. How many people would be willing to get involved with our churches, but they do not feel like they have any right to offer their time, talents, or treasure? They are the outsiders.

The Bible still says that we have the duty and responsibly to go out and compel them to come in. We are biblically required to literally insist that they get involved with our churches. Many people, like me today, do not feel they have the right to intrude into an established program.

Do they have something to offer? Sure they do. There are doctors who could help your church minister to thousands more than they do today. There are licensed counselors, legislators, business owners, chefs, and many, many more who could walk in the door and add value, talent, and treasure to your established church. But as an outsider, they don’t feel comfortable just barging into your program uninvited.

I think there are many who would be honored to be part of our churches. I will go one step further and say, I believe they desire to be part of our churches; but in our efforts to provide a program, we have inadvertently built a wall. So, we fail to reach those who would gladly step in and become part of what we are doing.

Just a few thoughts from an outsider today – who wanted to be an insider.

The Condition of the Church

As we turned left onto Palmyra Road, I saw an unusual and seemingly out of place structure:  just sitting on the other side of the tree line was the Palmyra Community Presbyterian Church.  We were only a few miles outside of Vincennes, in the rich farmland and beautiful rolling hills of western Indiana.  Nestled within the huge old trees sat a church—red bricked, with stained-glass and a bell tower standing as high as ever, but with a sad and wanton appearance of abandonment. 

As we parked our motor home in the beautiful cleared grove next to the parcel that contained the old church, I could not stop thinking of that great testament of faith and community – just sitting there forsaken and forgotten!  Then, as I began to ask about the church, I learned that it had been unused for almost twenty years.

Today we took a few minutes to explore the old cemetery and look around the building. Some of the head stones were nothing less than fascinating.  One was reminiscent of a man from Liverpool born in the 1700’s. Then there was the ten-month-old baby from the 1800’s and several more. But my mind continued to contemplate the church.

 

Its cornerstone bore the date of 1892. The stained-glass windows were as beautiful as any in the world. There were not more than two alike in the entire building. The bell tower still contained the bells of the original design. I found a window with one small pane broken out and used my camera to capture what remained on the inside. I saw pews, instruments, carpet, stained wood, books, an American flag, and a pulpit. But I also could not help but see what used to be.

  

My mind went back to how it must have been 116 years ago as the excitement of the first brick was laid upon the foundation.  What it could have taken to cut and hew the great beam rafters. The homemade scaffolding it must have required to create the bell tower and steeple. I am sure everyone there would expect the church to carry on for centuries, even to continue without end.

 

* * *

My mind has fought the reality of the lonesome look of this great church. The doors overgrown by untrimmed shrubs. Doors that used to open and allow the community to hear the sound of a preacher and the resounding chorus of the choir. . . now shut.

 

The windows of stained-glass that used to allow the sunlight of a Sunday morning to glimmer in the hair of those who went to seek the Lord, and represent to the passer-by what the building was dedicated to and what the church stands for. . . now only a tribute to what used to be.   

 

The bells of marked time that used to signal the measure of a day to a people whose ears were tuned to hear from miles away the sweet sound. . . now quiet.

 

The organ and piano with hymnals opened whose sounds used to fulfill the scriptures admonishing us to praise the Lord. . . collecting dust.

 

The pulpit that once held the Word of the Lord along with the notes of a prepared minister and the perspiration of a fervent message. . .now silent.

 

* * *

My mind raced to our day and the need to pray:

 

A day when true men of God are few and far between; and the compelling desire to be the true church is in direct competition with the fleshly desire to enjoy a Christian concert and call it church. I saw today what many thought was an indestructible structure. And I fear, that without the direct help of the Lord, we too could very easily become a lonely memorial of what used to be.

 

Oh, God, do not allow our doors to become overgrown by our lack of effort to be the church you desire for us to be. Please do not let our prejudice and pretense dictate the condition of the welcome at our doors.

 

Oh, God, do not allow our windows to be just a memorial to what we used to be. Oh, that we would fall in love again with you and our hearts would be in tune with you and our bodies your temple! Oh, that we would continue to gladly display ourselves as separated and set apart from this world and unto you!

 

Oh, God, do not allow our outward sounds to be silenced by our times and the preferences of others. Oh, that we could boldly proclaim your greatness to our communities and that our families would know the certain sound of your house.

 

Oh, God, do not allow our instruments of praise to be silenced by the sounds of this world. Oh, that the voice of your people would still come up before you as a sweet savor, a welcomed accompaniment to our lives dedicated to your will and purpose.

 

Oh, God, please do not allow our pulpits to become silenced by the pop culture and faddish ministry methods that abound today.  Let us not cower to the lowly, fleshly desires of the masses and multitudes, but proclaim the truth that you are the only way. Would that our fervency for your word and your way would outweigh the pull of the flesh and its carnal desires. Oh, to preach you and you crucified, buried and alive again with all power!   In a day oh, Lord, where the call to minister in your sanctuary is drowned out by the cultural appeal for secular security, please help us! Help us so that in another 116 years, if you tarry, men will still be preaching your gospel, baptizing sinners in your name, praying for them as you fill them with your Spirit, and seeing your people live holy lives before you.  Amen and amen.

 

Delay is NOT Denial

We know that God's word states that His ways are above our ways. I have found that when we say we trust the Lord, it must come with the commitment to endure his timing and do so without question. 

It's easy for us to get up and preach faith.  We can talk about Job and his losses, but we always follow  with his blessings (with a hearty emphasis on his blessings); but to say the words "The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away" takes more than just a good feeling on a Sunday night. It takes a solid assurance that the Lord is working for my good, along with the understanding that not everything will be comprehended by my finite mind, and not everything that takes place within my life is going to be good. 

I have been to the point of frustration many times since late last year when we placed our house on the market. We priced it very competitively and then dropped the price to make it more appealing. It has not sold. It has had very little traffic other than the ton of flyers that we have put out by the sign. I know we are in the will of God, for He is doing mighty things in our lives. I have been the target of more prophetic words this year than in my entire ministry or life. We know without a doubt that we are going in the specific direction the Lord wants us to... but the sale of our home has been in question for a while now.   

Each time I drive through the neighborhood, I see more homes going up for sale. I see more homes being built by our builder. About two months ago, construction began on the new addition going up right next to ours, and now there are twelve homes in various stages of completion in that area.  A couple of weeks ago I noticed the start of a new addition about a half mile from us.  And all along I am wanting to be free from my home, out on the road full-time in our motor home. 

 

I drive out of my addition and think, God, I guess you just want to show your might and ability to do the impossible. God don't you see these "for sale" signs?  I know you see the many houses being built –and  while I know you are able to sell our home in this environment, even with the housing market instability.... 

Frankly, I did not understand why he was dragging his feet... HA!  I now know why we have not sold our home! Let me try to explain. 

As many around us know, we have been working for a couple of months to buy a motor home. Everyone knows about the housing market and the slump it is in.  I have had much difficulty because in the various lenders’ minds, the two markets go together. Lending on RVs has become a tight business. You basically have to not need the money to buy one before you can borrow the money to buy one!  

So in order for us to qualify to buy the motor home, I had to put up some acreage I own outside of town. No big deal, but here is the miracle—above  my human understanding. 

Texas is one of the two states with a Homestead Law (of this nature) still in existence.  Which in short means, the state is unable to take your final 200 acres. This is probably a great thing for the protection of your land and assets, but it also eliminates the possibility to pledge it as collateral for a loan. 

My bank would not make a loan for an RV right now, but they will loan on acreage. This is how we have structured our loan. However, it would have never been a possibility without owning our home in town. Our home we reside in is the portion of land the state recognizes as a homestead. Therefore without owning the house we live in, in town, the acreage in the country could not have been used to acquire the loan we needed for the motor home, and thus fulfill the will of God in our life! 

All the while I have tried to trust Him without understanding the details and why. But I can say today, he knew all along. His ways are above our ways. His wisdom is without limits. His understanding is infinite! I am glad we can trust him. When our lives are evaluated, all we can say is, We are so small, while He is so GREAT—and the Victory is still His! 

My Time Has Been Short

I wanted to stop long enough to say we have been super busy since our recent spring break. It is my intention to get back to the blog-world in the next few days. We have much to tell, but need the time to post it for you. 

God bless you all!

Still Havin' Some Fun

Well, it has been a few days since I have stopped to update the countless masses who read this thing.  :o)  I do apologize for the delay in my posting.  How do you write and post pictures about rest and relaxation? 

We did see some pretty good rains and and some minor flooding while in the St. Louis area. However, we survived and were able to get out of town without much delay. 

 

Yesterday afternoon we arrived in Branson, Missouri, to stay a couple of days.  

This morning we visited a man named Jack who has a motor home for sale.  Jack and I have become friends over the course of this year.  He told me today that from the second time we spoke on the phone he was convinced that we would be the next owners of the motor home.  He has, since that time, taken his "for sale" sign down and turned away potential buyers until we are in position to buy it.

Today we toured it and took it out for a drive.  I look forward to fulfilling the will of the Lord through the use of this vehicle.

You can see a few pictures of the motor home by visiting our website at: www.theapostolicmessage.org and then go to "about us" and click on the "our dream" link. 

 

Here is a picture of Kayla playing inside the motor home today...

And then a picture of Addie for good measure...

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The Gateway...

Today started out much different from most all other Sunday mornings.  Usually we get up early, get the family ready, and then head out to get to Sunday School on time.  Yes, this morning was different.  After we finished our breakfast, I got a few practice holes in on the golf course.  

Then we set out to go see the Gateway Arch along with some other sites.  We all experienced the tram ride to the top and back down again... so from now on, we can say we have ben to the top of the monument.  It was, I guess, monumental for us all...  

We finished the day with a great meal from The Old Spaghetti Factory just a couple blocks from the Arch, on First street.   

Here are some of the pictures of the day.

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Just Havin’ Some Fun!

I decided today that I would temporarily change the pace and purpose of my blog to reflect our spring break get-a-way.  So, beginning now and running through Easter Sunday, you may want to check back each evening to see and read the happenings of the day in the Wells’ lives. 

We kicked off our trip today with a group of friends at Lambert’s Cafe in Sikeston, MO.  Great food with great people and quite a few throwed rolls! 

Here are some of those friends...

Then we arrived at the Timber Creek Resort just south of St. Louis. 

Taking a short round of golf with one of my favorite little buddies, my older daughter, Kayla. 

Tune in tomorrow night for another blog episode or blogisode.... 

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The Power of Perhaps

Several years ago, having just started my first real job at a major communications company as an engineer, I realized that my education was not really what got me the job. 

I studied hard and enjoyed most of my coursework on my way to my beloved degree.  I thought I had learned enough to run a space station or single handedly operate the world's communication networks; however, after the first two weeks in my small six by six cubicle, I came to the understanding that I knew practically nothing at all about anything.  With my brain feeling like a ball of wet spaghetti, I pondered why I spent so much time learning things that had absolutely nothing to do with anything.  It took a great deal of on-the-job-training for me to be the engineer I was expected to be. 

Somewhere along the way I figured out that higher education is not about teaching people everything they will ever need to know about their chosen field of study.  Rather it is dedicated to teaching people to think on a higher level.  A person who graduates with an Associates has proven his or her ability to "think and perform" on an Associates level of education; likewise, a person who holds a doctorate has proven a much higher level of thinking and performance. 

Harvard, Yale, Rice and other schools of high regard are dedicated to a single purpose. While most think of money, that must be number two. More importantly, these institutions are focused on the task of teaching people to think.  If an individual can be taught that perhaps they have not seen everything, then it is possible they can imagine that there is more. 

We as humans have learned that we will only go as far as we can imagine ourselves to go. The scientist works hard to expand his thinking to allow for more opportunities and possibilities, while the attorney will try with everything he has to see every possible angle of his case.  The inventor tries with all his might to think beyond the invented to find a place of possibility. 

Just as we understand the only way to move forward and expand our horizons is to allow an environment for open thought and the next new great idea, we see the opposite mindset will condemn us to settle for much less than is possible. 

The power of perhaps has fueled the search to move forward since the world began. Virtually everything that has been gained in this earth has come through the simple yet profound power of perhaps. 

My mind goes to a young man who was a son of a great king of the children of Israel, Jonathan. The heavy hand of the Philistine army had taken its humiliating toll. No mighty warriors were attempting to do anything about the dire situation. It was an unfortunate day. The Bible tells us that there were no swords to be found in all of Israel—except with king Saul and his son Jonathan. I cannot imagine how these men allowed this type of situation to overtake them; nevertheless, it had.  

Then seemingly out of nowhere the thought struck Jonathan:  Perhaps Jehovah will work for us today, and the Power of perhaps began to drive his every move.  At the end of that particular day, there was a great victory celebrated within the camp and the rule of the Philistines had been broken—by the power of perhaps. 

There is a power made available to us when we allow ourselves to ponder the concept of possibility.  It is not about our human ability to think, nor is it found anywhere else within us.  It is found when we allow ourselves to think that perhaps the almighty God could go to work for us.  Perhaps today God will work a miracle for me. Perhaps today God will provide for my need.  Perhaps God can change the course of my life.  Perhaps….

The Bible clearly states, we have not - because we ask not.  Perhaps he will provide if we can conceive within our minds that He will.  For my God's able to do exceedingly abundantly and above all I can ask or think... so perhaps he is big enough!

I submit to you today that the concept of "Perhaps" can be a powerful proposition in the hands of my God. 

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The Ministry of ‘The Rocks’

This morning as I awoke, my mind was upon the rocks of life and their ministry to us. Maybe I should take a moment to explain the concept of the unexplainable. 

In the animal kingdom we find birds that are designed by God to eat various seeds and grains.  The interesting thing I learned sometime ago was that these birds, such as chickens, blue jays, and doves, do not have a stomach that functions as other animals.  Instead, they have an organ called the gizzard. The gizzard works in a unique way with something called grit, and grit is simply dirt, sand, and small pieces of rocks. 

With regularity and strength the gizzard will squeeze and constrict the grains and seeds against this grit or rocks to produce a usable nutritional substance for the growth and development of the bird.  Without the rocks the nutrition of the seeds and grains would never be realized, and without those rocks there would be no development or growth in the bird's body. 

My mind goes to a man by the name of Abraham and his wife Sarah who desired to have a child so much, but somehow were unable to conceive.  The time spent throughout their early years was probably filled with much frustration and perhaps even envy of those who had as many children as they desired.  But on the other side of the miracle of conception and while they held their baby boy, it was the time they had spent without a child that made him that much more special.  It was that time of lack and frustration that I would like to term “The Rocks.” 

It seems that anything of value we ever gain in the Kingdom of God will be produced against the ministry of the Rocks.  Any victory worth claiming and enjoying will come as a result of a battle. The times we spend on the mountaintop will always be balanced with the struggle it took to get there.  

Any joy we have in this life will be a direct result of the ministry of the Rocks.

An interesting thing I found in my reading of the bird’s digestive system was... the rocks never digest. The rocks will pass on, but only to be replaced by other rocks. They never break down in the process of digestion. 

In life we often face these rocky types of situations knowing that we will never be able to break them down.   We will not be able to analyze or explain the whys surrounding our rocks. They come into our life for a season.  Then they pass without even the simplest explanation. 

It can be somewhat liberating to realize that I do not have to be able to understand what the trial was about, who brought it into my life, or why I had to go through it. The bird simply eats and grows as a result of the amazingly designed system it is blessed to have. 

I believe we would do well to take a lesson from the Ministry of the Rocks and allow God to develop and grow us as He sees fit. 

It is the times of discomfort and pain that bring the most peace and power on the other side. He says, “Be still and know that I am God.”  (from Psalms 46:10)

The following passage from the book of Isaiah comes to mind: 

 

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.”

(Isaiah 55:8-12 KJV)

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Banana Peels and Power

This morning I was feeding my 14 month old baby girl a banana and I saw a profound truth being displayed in front of me, I just had to share it with you.  

My little girl Addison Anne, we call her Addie, was enjoying a wholesome breakfast which included a ripe yellow banana. As I reached up and grabbed it off of the counter, she said, “nah nah” to which I replied, yes baby it is a “nah nah.” 

She smiled as I peeled back the outer layer and presented her with the exposed meat of the banana. She took a bite and then another... somewhere during her breakfast, she decided she would hold the “nah nah” and so I let her. The funny thing was, instead of getting into where the meat was, she wanted to chew on the dried stem. I told her, no and showed her the good stuff again... then I looked back and she had the stem in her mouth again. All I can think is, maybe she liked the way it felt to her teething mouth? 

As I finished helping her with breakfast I felt like the Lord shared with me the concept of this writing. 

How many times, in our walk with the Lord, do we have fulfilling and sustaining power provided to us; and rather than enjoying the meat and substance of God, we settle for just a surface and sometimes insignificant portion? 

Just as my little girl knew what the “nah nah” was, she knew what to call it, and she knew what it looked like on the outside, but even with that bit of knowledge she was happy to settle for much less than what was made available to her. 

As a 21st century Christian, we know all the right things to say, and we seem to know a great deal about God and His word, but I pose this question - how often do we really experience the portion of meat that He has planned for our lives. 

My desire is to enjoy all my Father has for my life. It may take more effort than we initially want to put forth, and it may go beyond our understanding of what we need, but there is enough power available at the hand of our Father than we could ever need if we will allow Him to feed us as He desires to. 

I don’t ever want to settle for the peeling and stems when I can enjoy the meat of the power of God. 

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I Feel Compelled to Testify

Late last night, or early this morning rather, I was praying and thanking the Lord for what he had done for me. When I begin to think how insignificant, weak, and powerless I am - and then let my mind wander into how significant, powerful and mighty he is, I am brought to tears to think that he cares for me. I feel like God impressed me to testify of his greatness and share some of what he did for me last night.

For the past several weeks I have been working on the next phase of our ministry (which includes a motor home and the selling of our home). While working on this, I would turn to different people in my life, some even on this forum, and end up with their thoughts and ideas about our future.... Most have been incredibly positive, and a few have been somewhat negative. Perhaps we should be cautious, lest we begin to sound like Job’s friends without even realizing it. Sometimes, I think we just need to let a man hear from God....

I spent a couple of hours with a wealthy retired banker this week, and as he and I talked... I became more and more down-heartened about the situation. It seems impossible. On my way home I stopped in to talk with my dad about my findings, and he simply said, “You know God does his best work when we can’t do any more.” I said, “I know this, I preach this, and I have even seen the Lord prove this concept with my own life many times.” But somehow, each time we find ourselves facing a new situation of impossibility, it seems to leave that exact same feeling of hopelessness in the pit of our stomach, just like the other times before, no matter how much faith we have in God’s ability. Well, at least I do. 

I went to church last night and was able to sit and be a part of the service since I was not out preaching anywhere... I was just enjoying myself and my night off... needing a word from the Lord, but not really expecting one. The song service was nice, and the specials were done well. When the man of God got up to preach, there were a few words of exhortation, then tongues and interpretation, twice. The second applied to me and where I am right now. The Lord kindly said to quit listening to others around you, that he was in control. I took this word to heart. 

 

I think that there is a time when we should seek out the “multitude of counsel,” maybe when we are dealing with situations or decisions with people, but not when we have a word from the Lord. He does not need the counsel or the opinion of man to bring about his word. 

I have been struggling through the thought-process of man - when to man it is literally impossible to accomplish what the Lord has given to him. 

This is the part I have been wanting to get to. Towards the end of service the minister came over and sat down beside me. He began to give me a word from the Lord, which included things like: we are in the perfect will of God, the time is right for the the things God has put in our heart, God will move on the hearts of men for the finances, that he will sell our home... wow! You talk about a God who cares for us!

I had just about decided that afternoon that we were somehow making a wrong turn, and the doors were being shut, not opened... but the Lord cared enough to stop by and vocally speak his message into my life last night. 

I just had to share my heart of joy today with someone. God is on the move and I am humbled to be a part of what he is doing. Out of the multiplied millions of people on this planet, God took time for a simple and grateful servant last night. 

I am not special; He is. I am not good; He is. I am not worthy; He is. 

Who am I, that the God of heaven and all eternity would be mindful of me, the least of servants? I am brought to my knees by the greatness of my God. 

Thank you for allowing me to share my testimony with you today.

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